Wishing I could be a little more selfless

Every year that the Christmas season ends, I find myself wishing more and more that I could live more like my savior. I have a deep testimony that no matter what is happening in my life, who is in my life, and what I am doing, it is my Savior Jesus Christ that I owe my life to. Most days I am certain that I haven't given him enough of my day and time, but I am trying. I know that he lives. I am grateful for living examples and testimonies of this reality like the Madeira Spanish Ward. There are always more ways to show the Savior our love and gratitude.

They Gave Up Their Christmas

A missed but cherished friend!

So I know my last blog was also devoted toward a dear friend, but these are some of the people I am grateful for in my life. Obviously I am so grateful for family, and the wonderful influence they are... and don't worry, I will devote a blog to them soon enough. But I wanted to devote this blog to a friend who has help me a lot recently. So this one is for "scotty boy"!! I met Scotty towards the end of my senior year as we both found out that we had received the Ambassador scholarship from USU. Instantly, I connected with him, and felt like we would become very close friends. That proved to be true very quickly, before we came up to school, we hiked up to Stuart Falls in provo canyon, and although I knew nothing about him prior to that time, I knew that day that I had gained an incredible friend that I would need that coming year. We had so much fun Freshman year, and I discovered a sense of humor that I never knew I had, and laughter that I still cherish... making "sweet sweet rhymes", him teaching me a thing or two about soccer (and trust me, I am still a struggling student in this area), cutting his hair-- good thing his sister Alyse could fix it, taking care of the "kids" at UAE, and enjoying lots of good laughs ( not to mention being his mother in creative arts... lets just say sometimes he struggled to stay awake/come to class). I have mentioned him before because he gave me the nickname that is the namesake of this blog "Hilsteeeze" and it still sticks around the ambassador office... and every time I hear it, a part of me misses this kid a little. However, I am incredibly proud of him and honored that he is my friend- he is currently serving the lord in the Sierra Leone Freetown, Africa mission. And he is constantly teaching me new and important things about the gospel. As I read his e-mails, I am reminded of the blessings I enjoy within the gospel, and also the blessings of living where I do and having soooo many opportunities. He serves in EXTREMELY humble circumstances, in a land that has literally been torn apart in so many ways. As I hear about some of the people and circumstances he encounters I am humbled that I have been so blessed to live where I do. But even more than that, I am humbled by the faith of the people he serves. And you can tell by the picture, they are a beautiful people, inside and out. It has allowed me to recognize how desperately EVERY son or daughter on this earth needs the gospel of Jesus Christ, and especially the healing powers of the atonement. I know he won't see this, but I am certain he knows how much I love him and am sincerely grateful for his friendship!!! Thanks Scotty!

"A friend is a possession we earn, not a gift"

How lucky I am to have earned such a wonderful friend!!

If there is one person these past few years that I have laughed with, cried with, cried from laughter with, it is my dear friend Heather Taylor "H Taylor"!

How I love this woman, and what she adds to my life! She is spirited, never settles for less than who she thinks she can be and runs full speed ahead to the woman knows she has the potential to be! But most importantly, she is always there... these past 2 years have had their ups and downs for both of us, but through it all, she has been my listening ear, and true friend!

There are certain people in our lives that I feel give us a little glimpse of what our associations will be like in heaven, and this is exactly what Heather has done for me. Thanks for the glimpse Heather, and for being you and ALWAYS allowing me to do the same! I love you H Taylor! You once asked where I get my courage from... I think a piece of it is from my associations with people like you!

Gratitude

I have been reflecting over my life these past few months, and especially my attitude. I have noticed that one thing has been lacking... Gratitude!

I am grateful for people, I love people, and I love learning about them and being with them

I am grateful for smiles- I love it when I come across happy smiles on people's faces and when I can watch and wonder "what makes them happy?"!

I am grateful for family. Even though I don't always act like it, i hope my family knows I love them and would do anything for them. How lucky that we have eternity!

I am grateful for nature. I would literally hug a tree, only because I think things like trees flowers, water, grass, etc. all testify of Heavenly Father's love for his children. I sometimes feel so small next to a mountain, and am humbled to think that I was

god's crowning creation.

I am grateful to be alive. I am human, and it is all to true that sometimes I think life stinks, but in god's great mercy, he allows me little moments or tender mercies that remind me "Life is oh so sweet!!". I have a lot to live for!

Loneliness... an easy friend to find

The past few weeks and days in particular, I have felt one particular feeling a lot... lonely.

But as I reflect this feeling, it seems a little ridiculous for several reasons. I have all sorts of friends surrounding me, at work, at church, where I live... there are plenty of people to call friends. I have family only 30 minutes from me, and another hour drive or so, and I can find even more family. So why do I feel lonely?!!!!! So here I am trying to remedy this aillment because its the worst kind to have! Looking for others who may be lonely, trying to serve others which is usually a good remedy to loneliness. And what I have heard is the best remedy... work. yet still, I feel it, so why is it loneliness is my new best friend? I started reading some talks and came across this phrase, "Heavenly Father needs servants trained through experience to minister to the needs of his children". So here is the conclusion I have come to, maybe this experience isn't for me. In one of those ironies of life, when I feel the most in need of someone else, I am learning things to help someone else. So for now, I am learning a lesson I could not learn without experience, and for that I am grateful.

"In the very act of making up our minds to confront loneliness, half the battle is won. For if we seek the Lord through service, prayer, and righteousness, we will find that we are not alone" (see Rev. 3:20).

I love summer!

I Love the summertime!

I have lucked out this summer this is how my week usually goes...

1.Go to work Monday morning and work with my four best friends, Kaylee, Scott, Felecia, and Angela where we plan Youth Conferences, quote tracy, dance dance and dance some more, and work a little in between... but they say if you love what you do, its not really work, thats how I feel.

2. Keep working until... WEDNESDAY NIGHT!

3. You know what Wednesday night means, COUNTRY SWING!!!

4. Keep working until 1:00 am Saturday morning

5. Sleep in Saturday- if I don't work- and end off Saturday hanging with my roomates- Jess, Heather, and Kirsten... seriously love these girls!

Ooooohhhhh yeah.... my life is good :)